Evolving Through the Seasons

All Is Well... In Spite Of

Choosing Faith When My Feelings Tell Another Story

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee."— Isaiah 26:3 (KJV)

Every morning I wake up with a choice. Some days the circumstances waiting for me haven't changed. The concerns are still there. The prayers haven't all been answered the way I would like. There are people I love who are hurting, situations I cannot fix, and things I simply don't understand. I can allow those realities to determine the condition of my spirit. Or, I can acknowledge every one of them and still choose to trust God. For me, that's where joy and sorrow learned to live in the same house.

Both Can Be True

I've learned through grief that joy and sorrow are not necessarily opposites. I can miss someone deeply and smile at their memory. I can shed tears and still be grateful. I can carry concern for tomorrow and genuinely enjoy today. Both can be true. As I walk through this current season, I'm discovering that the same truth applies far beyond grief. There are things happening in my life right now that I would change if I could. My family is navigating health concerns. People I love are experiencing loss, uncertainty, and unexpected changes. Some prayers remain unanswered. Those things are real. So is my faith.

My faith doesn't require me to pretend that I'm not hurting. Jesus Himself wept. It doesn't require me to call something good when it hurts. It doesn't require me to smile when I need to cry. Pain, sorrow, disappointment, fear, frustration, and uncertainty are part of the human experience. I don't believe acknowledging them makes my faith weak. It makes me human. But my human emotions are not the only things present. God is present too.

Where My Joy Comes From

There is an important distinction I've come to understand. The difficult circumstances in my life don't give me joy. Death, Anxiety, Pain, Cancer, and Financial challenges don't give me joy. Watching people I love struggle doesn't give me joy. Losing people I care about doesn't give me joy. Jesus does. Galatians 5:22–23 describes the fruit of the Spirit as love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance. Those words mean something different to me today than they did when life was easier. Joy isn't something I have to manufacture because everything is going well. Peace isn't pretending I'm not concerned. Longsuffering isn't denying that something hurts. For me, they are evidence that something deeper than my circumstances is sustaining me. My pain tells the truth about what I'm experiencing. My joy tells the truth about Whom I'm trusting. Both are real.

The Choice I Make Every Day

There are mornings when I have to make that choice all over again. I can focus entirely on what might happen. I can rehearse every possible outcome. I can allow fear to take me somewhere God hasn't asked me to go. Or I can say: God, I trust You with today. Not next month. Not next year. Today. That doesn't mean every anxious thought immediately disappears. It doesn't mean I never become tired or overwhelmed. And it certainly doesn't mean I understand everything God is doing. It simply means I keep returning to what I know. God has been faithful before. God is faithful now. And whatever tomorrow brings, God will still be faithful. Some days I have to remind myself of that more than once. And that's okay.

All Is Well... In Spite Of

This season has given the words "all is well" a deeper meaning for me. They don't mean everything is the way I want it to be. They don't mean everyone I love is healthy. They don't mean every prayer has been answered. They don't mean I have no concerns. They mean something much simpler and much deeper: God is still God. So... All is well...in spite of the diagnosis. All is well...in spite of uncertainty. All is well...in spite of grief. All is well...in spite of unanswered questions. All is well...in spite of circumstances I cannot control. Not because I know how every story will end. But because I know Who is with me in the story.

Temporary Things and an Eternal Hope

The older I get, the more aware I become that so much of what consumes us belongs only to this side of eternity. Our bodies experience pain. Our hearts experience sorrow. Relationships change. Circumstances change. People we love leave this earth. And eventually, so will we. Revelation 21:4 gives me a picture of what awaits beyond these temporary seasons—a time when God will wipe away every tear and death, sorrow, crying, and pain will be no more. That promise doesn't make today's pain imaginary. It reminds me that today's pain isn't permanent. There will come a day when there is no cancer. No dementia. No anxiety. No financial hardship. No funerals. No grief. No goodbyes. Those things belong to this side of eternity. But Jesus belongs to both. And that is where my hope rests and that is what makes me know that All is Well in spite of these temporary conditions and situations.

Still Evolving

Week by week, this series seems to be revealing something to me as I'm writing it. I started by recognizing that life doesn't always end one season before beginning another. Sometimes several seasons arrive at once. Then I began seeing how experiences from my own seasons have helped me walk alongside others in theirs. Now I'm realizing why all of those seasons can coexist without completely consuming me.

None of them is where I've placed my hope.

My hope is in Jesus Christ. So I will still have days when I cry. Days when I'm concerned. Days when I wish things were different. Days when I don't understand. And hopefully, many days filled with laughter, celebration, gratitude, and beautiful memories. Through all of them, I keep returning to the same place. God is with me. God is faithful. God is still in control. And because of that, I can look honestly at everything happening around me—without denying any of it—and still say: All is well with my soul... in spite of.